the formula is so simple

[Altruist]

you obviously need a substitute to those things, problem is nothing is good enough for you

i mean that's fucking obvious on paper and from the pov of a psychology graduate, but things dont work like that

"oh, i just need a, b and c to get rid of x, y and z" - humans/nature is more complex than that. again (assume its bs if you want, i dont care), im not coming from a place where an alcohol high (at home) is the best experience i have  ever had, yet i just dont see how starting to take regular long walks, exercising, getting a gf and checking up on my friends  or starting a family could equate that physical pleasure at this point. i d take john nash experience over that any day of the week, and i m aware it's nowhere as rosy as it is in the movie

it does feel like it should work that way after i manage to do it for a week or two, but then it becomes just as boring as everything else again, and gives you no kick comparable to this degenerate incel freak rotting i ve been indulging into (the important thing to note here is i still have the "i can or will just ascend some time in the future, so i m good just chilling for now" at the back of my mind, whether based on reality on delusion)