i feel like i betrayed myself

[Altruist]

Zagreb is pretty close to the sea right? Get a car and a boat/trailer to tow it with. Getting drunk on a boat is extremely therapeutic. I plan on getting a tiny dighny with a 15hp outboard, but I'm just projecting things I personally enjoy. Idk. No point hating yourself for wasted time. Could be 1000× worse

sure, life can always get worse in an instant, but i'm talking about wasted life, not just time

having your life hijacked by modern tech feels so alienating and surreal

just taking a walk on a warm spring day is a religious experience compared to fucking opening alerts on internet fucking forums, or watching a shit yt video for the 50th time. i havent been feeling alive for years now, and the tragedy is that i have completely opposite experiences from my earlier years, which makes me realize how tragic my current situation is

there were days when i didn't need 800 mg of jewpills, 2.5 l of alcoholic beverages, youtube, age of empires, tranny porn, thepiratebay, 3 forums, 7 sandwiches and 8 hours free for rotting COMBINED just to feel ANYTHING