i cringe at every social interaction of my life

[Alexander]

i cringe hard at every social interaction that i ever had that i remember. i just think about it and my whole face just crunches up and images of suicide flash in my mind

Even when it isnt even a so called 'bad' memory it happens. i'm like fuuuuuuuuuu--- why did i do that? why did i puyt myself in that situation?

Really its better if i hide in my room and try not to talk to these normies but i need to go out sometimes. 

it reallly makes me laugh when people say on reddit or something 'help me to be more social guys!' ...

--- why are you doing something that your body doesnt want you to do? you will just humiliate yourself and your body will punish you with cringe memories like i suffer from

[Alexander]

today i remember i was thinking about the time some old boomer idiot came up to me in the train station and made conversation. it wasnt even a totally bad conversation apart from my constant autism but not relatively bad. but i thought about it today and i was like FUUUUUUUU--- and wanted to kill myself so badly

[Blau]

That's is pretty much me ntmaxxing is very hard but necessary 😔

[Alexander]

That's is pretty much me ntmaxxing is very hard but necessary 😔

its unneccesary suffering. so many kids put themselves through hell because they think they are going to become normal if they force themselves to talk to people


but then they just get tortured by the normies. they are rejected and it just lowers their self esteem even more in the end.

eventually they end up alone with lots of cringe memories that drive them to the point of suicide daily