something in me changed

[Altruist]

Prolonged clonazepam use and drinking causes brain damage

What you are describing is brain damage and what happened to my dad (I think or maybe he was always like that)

explains the gymcel thing entirely

actually yeah, whenever court experts (psychiatrists) are giving their expert opinion on the accused, they always specify whether long term abuse of alcohol/drugs led to damaged CNS and physical alterations affecting cognitive functions or not (relevant for legal insanity, because their point is that the person can't be held criminally liable for their behaviors past a certain point)