on my knees in the closet floor, cock in hand

[I Already Know I'm Ugly]

staring down at a pathetic load I released onto a dirty hoodie as I listen to the going-ons of my family members through the paper thin walls of my cage.  
Using my good reason, I know that I’m less than an animal and that my life could only ever be misery. Yet somehow I live on. 
A strong will to live? No. That can’t possibly be it. I could hardly fight for my own survival. Perhaps a lack of energy to overcome inertia