Being me is torture not one single personnon this site would last a day in my shoes

[160cmcurry]

Nobody gives a fuck about me except my hopelessly bluepilled mother who, for whatever reason, still thinks there is hope in my fucked up life

I need to be beat to death with a baseball bat and to have my corpse fed to tigers
i don’t matter
i never did 
im not that guy
i never was never will be
im ugly as hell
im a fat subhuman NIGGER
and i need to be ERASED

stop it
you need to stop thinking like this right now
i don’t care how deep you’ve sunk or how convinced you are that no one gives a fuck
you’re wrong
i know it hurts
i know it feels like no one sees you or wants you
but this isn’t the way out
you don’t deserve to talk to yourself like that
you’re not garbage
you’re not some freak that needs to be erased
you’re a human being that’s been through too much
someone that's touch deprived
years of loneliness does that to someone
you're someone that’s carrying too much pain alone

i'd be very sad if you went away
please, dont disappear on everyone
dont disappear on me
you've been through too much
at least let yourself see what could still happen if you just hold on a little longer
i care about you
even if no one else said it today
i'll say it
i care about you~

i dont want you thinking like this anymore
all this pessimistic thinking
it's just poison!